He knows my heart so well

God is like....the best thing to ever invade my life :)

I got to spend the whole weekend with my brother-in-law and sister and niece. It was really like "the old days" when Carrie, Chris and I would hang out all of the time. I miss those times a lot. But it's better now because little Kaylie is there and she adds a certain flare to the crew that none of us grown ups could bring lol.

She is so awesome! And Carrie and Chris are such amazing parents! If there's one thing Kaylie will never EVER lack it is LOVE LOVE AND MORE LOVE. We are all obsessed with that beautiful baby girl. And we get excited about the dumbest things. I never thought i would be so excited about a baby pooping. But she did and I was so happy for her because she hadn't in like a day (which is not good for babies) Carrie cried a little, Chris was so grossed out because it was NAAASSSTTTTTYYYYY and i was dancing around with her singing "you cute little pooper, good job little pooper" Babies bring out the strange in people.

We watched a movie called fireproof made by the same people who did facing the giants. It was really good. Acting wasn't so great, some of it was cheesy, but the concept of it was really good.

I was having a rough day today because it's getting hard to leave home. I don't really want to be here right now. Not just because of Kaylie but because I really do miss my family. I miss being around them and hanging out with them as much as i want. It's just a hard time in life to be away. And I'm dealing with other things as well, so it was just a hard day. I spent most of it driving so all i had to do was think about everything and i didn't like it. By the time i got back to school i was at a breaking point. I was parking my car and i started crying and i said "God i need you. I really need to know that you're near me and that you love me and you're looking out for me. I really need that." And i came in my room and started unpacking then checked my facebook and on there was a video message from Erin Titus that was just an encouraging word.

There He was. God heard me. He loves me. He's looking out for me. He most definitely cares what's going on in my heart. And he knew I needed that message.

ya know, God is much bigger than I give him credit for. MUCH BIGGER!

This time is still hard, but God is going to keep sending me his messages through his Word and his people. And he will let me know that he is near.

That's all I need to know now.